Death of a Dream
by The Bloody Countess
Summary: Relena's Dream proves prophetic and Heero realizes her importance in his life too late...


centerbuDEATH OF A DREAM/u/bbr  
BY: Mainime/center  
  
pDisclaimers: Standard disclaimers apply…(I am merely conserving typing space…=P)  
  
pSome spoilers: I read in an article that Abraham Lincoln foresaw his own death through a very strange dream. He had asked a soldier from his dream "Who died?" and the soldier said, "The President. He was killed ten days ago." Ten days later, he was assassinated, the dream proving prophetic.  
  
p~*~*~  
  
pI stepped out from behind a tree and started to walk.   
  
pi'But to what?'/i I asked myself, as I made my way through the field. I heard the faint crunching of dead leaves underfoot, and I stopped at a clearing. There was a huge crowd gathered there and I could sense something heavy. I sensed a slight haze and the air smelled damp. I felt anguish, grief…and each emotion seemed to stab my heart like a sword.   
  
pI saw a white casket in the center and I also saw some media men gathered there, along with some soldiers.   
i'Whoever died must have been quite important,'/i I thought. Looking around, my eyes widened in shock to see my brother and my friends standing near the casket, all in black. They were weeping. But why?   
  
pI eased away from the crowd and stood near a soldier, whose face was partly hidden in the shadows. "Who died?" I asked. The soldier looked at me with tear-filled eyes, and he spoke to me with gentle reproach. "Child, have you no idea who lies here now?"  
  
pI shook my head and the soldier looked over to the casket. "A martyr, an icon, an angel, the embodiment of peace…" 'But why are there so many weeping?' I thought, looking around, puzzled. As if reading my mind, the soldier answered, "Princess Relena Peacecraft. She was assassinated ten days ago…the poor girl."  
  
pMy world went black at this.  
  
p~*~*~   
  
pI woke up with a start, my eyes wide. I breathed a sigh of relief and ran a hand through my damp bangs. There was no field, no crowd, no casket…I was back in the safety of my queen-size waterbed. "Only a dream," I murmured, as my eyes adjusted to the dark room.   
  
pI felt my heart slow down to a normal pace, and I whimpered involuntarily. What was the dream telling me? Was it signifying my impending fate? Or was it merely a symbolic dream that meant something else was in store for me?   
  
pI had to know…had to find out. There was just one person who could help me. I knew it was late, and he was probably still asleep, but he would understand. My hands trembled as I dialed on my cellular phone and waited for his answer.  
  
pA muffled voice greeted me, heavy with sleep. "Mmmrrgghhphh…Hello?" it rasped, as if its owner hadn't had a drink of water in days. "Duo? Is that you? I need your help."   
  
pMy voice sounded needy and I was on the verge of crying, but I didn't give a damn if I didn't sound like the cool politician I always was during the day. That was just a protective mask I wore, but at night, that mask would fall away and I was back to being the helpless girl, starved for a normal life away from the stench of politics.   
  
p" 'Jou-san? What's wrong?" All traces of sleep seemed to vanish from the American's voice and he sounded worried.  
  
p"Duo, can we meet somewhere and talk? Onegai?" I pleaded, clutching the only thing within my general vicinity. I picked up the teddy bear that Heero had given me for my birthday, holding it close to my chest and hoping that it would somehow assuage my fears.  
  
p"Sure thing. Just let me get dressed and we can go down to Benny's," Duo replied, speaking in soothing tones.  
  
p"Arigatou," I whispered, a tear trickling down my cheek.   
  
pI didn't want anyone to know about my dream other than Duo Maxwell. Whenever I had problems too great to solve, Duo would always tell me to consult a priest. (I wasn't one of those really religious people but I believed that there was some powerful entity watching me and helping me fulfill me dream of achieving peace.)  
  
pWell, there were no priests in this case, for it was too late for them to be awake. So, I had decided that Duo was the next best thing. Of course, the thought had never occurred to me that Heero was probably available. But knowing him, he would probably blast the receiver to smithereens if I called him and asked if I could meet him for something.   
  
pI shook my head. I wouldn't burden Heero with my own problems. He was too bPRE-OCCUPIED/b with his own missions and I would probably get in the way of everything.   
  
pI got up and slowly dressed in the oldest pair of jeans I could find, a gray sweater, and my favorite torn sneakers and then headed out the door.  
  
p~*~*~  
  
p"So tell me what's wrong, Jou-san."   
  
pDuo sat across me and munched down on his sundae, waiting for me to begin. No doubt he wanted an explanation for waking him up at such an ungodly hour. "No need for apologies. I'm all ears, so tell me what your problem is," he said, gulping down his milk in one go. He read my mind, yet again.  
  
p"It was this dream I had…"  
  
p"Nightmare?"  
  
p"No…nothing like that. But I saw a lot of things there, and the secrets revealed pretty much freaked me out," I replied, chewing my fries absently.   
  
pI decided to ask him a question. "Duo, do you believe in bESP/b? Or the paranormal?" The dream came back with such force that I involuntarily shuddered, hugging myself.   
  
pDuo was looking at me with wide violet eyes, and he exhaled slowly. "'Jou-san, this dream really frightened you. What did you see?"  
  
p"A white casket and mourners…soldiers everywhere…my brother and all my friends…too many people, Duo. I can't really remember the rest of it, but when I asked a soldier who died, he said it was me," I covered my face in my hands, not noticing Duo's sharp intake of breath and an uttered curse.  
  
pI was afraid of what Duo was going to say, but I knew he was shocked and he was trying to find the right words to say to console me.  
  
p"Look at me, 'Jou-san…"  
  
pI gazed into a pair of sympathetic violet eyes, so full of warmth and I smiled tremulously, unsure of what I should do. There was a little voice in my head mocking me, proclaiming how weak I was. i'That's probably why Heero doesn't want to have anything to do with you. You're weak, Relena Peacecraft.'/i   
  
p" 'Jou-san, your dream has it's own symbolism. I'm no psychic, but I know this. Some dreams are said to be prophetic, but in your case, I believe it symbolizes your fear of rejection, or being scorned by people. There's only about a tenth of a chance that this dream is as prophetic as *Abraham Lincoln's was supposed to be," Duo reassured me, squeezing my shoulder.  
  
p"Arigatou."  
  
p"Would you like me to tell Heero? Maybe he can help more than I can."  
  
p"Iie iie. Don't bother. He's too busy to worry about me."  
  
p"I understand." Duo smiled. i'But he cares for you, 'Jou-san. You just don't know how much he'd give his life a thousand times over for your sake,'/i he silently replied.   
  
pI smiled back, although it never reached my eyes. I was still worried about that dream but I tried to dismiss it as nerves. "Thank you for your time, Duo. I'm really sorry ~"  
  
p"The only thing you should be sorry about is the fact that I suck at giving advice," Duo interrupted, giving my shoulder an affectionate squeeze. "Now, go get your beauty rest. I'll tell Noin and Une to cancel all your appointments and let you off easy."  
  
p"I'm not sure you should ~"  
  
p"Aw, lay off it, 'Jou-san! You need a break, besides," Duo grinned, cutting off the rest of my sentence. "Now, get your cute little butt moving! It's three in the morning!"  
  
pI heaved a grateful sigh and left, smiling at Duo's attempt to lighten the heavy atmosphere around us. He was always so jovial, so cheerful… i'Hilde's one lucky gal to have him,'/i I told myself, half-wondering when a certain blue-eyed, dark-haired pilot would tell me how he felt about life now.  
  
p~*~*~  
  
pThe next few days for me weren't very normal anymore. Somehow, I felt the dream was an omen, signaling that something was coming to a close. I knew, deep inside me that I had to go about and get things done while I still had time.   
  
pThen, on the night before I was to die, I dreamt of my fathers. The one who had raised me and had called me his own and the one whom I had never known, except from Pargan's stories…  
  
pI was standing in a field full of honeysuckle, the breeze whipping my hair unbound. Then I heard two voices. One belonged to the man I called Father, while the other's was one I could not recognize. As I turned around, I saw two figures standing at a distance, their arms open.   
  
P"Come, Relena."  
  
pI immediately ran to the arms of the dark-haired man. The bearded man with long, ash-blond hair looked at me, his smile doing little to hide the disappointment in his eyes. I pulled out of my father's embrace and looked at the man with long hair. There was something so sad about him that I hugged him, as well.  
  
p"Relena...this is your real father, the ruler of the Cinq Kingdom. He entrusted you to me before he was murdered," my foster father smiled. I looked at the long-haired man and gasped. i'Those eyes! Where have I seen those eyes before?'/i   
  
pThe realization dawned upon me and in an instant, I saw Milliardo's face. The man was indeed, my real father. He looked so regal, so proud with his pale gold mane and glittering eyes. He had Milliardo's strong jawline, the same prominent nose and high cheekbones and a muscular build. And when he suddenly spoke, my breath caught in my throat.   
  
p" Relena, my Relena...You are like your mother. Everything about you is just like Helena."  
  
pOh, he sounded just the way I had dreamed he would sound. Tears sprang from my eyes and I buried my face in his chest, weeping with joy. I felt a gentle weight on my shoulder and looked up to find a beautiful woman smiling down at me. She looked very much like my older version, but what was different about her was that her smile spoke in volumes. Her hair was coiled up around her head and she stood tall, holding herself like a queen.  
  
p"Oh, Relena...my little baby. How you've grown..."  
  
pI reached out to embrace her, but when I tried, I felt nothing. She was fading away slowly, along with the two important men to whom I owed so much.  
  
p"Soon, Relena-girl...soon," my mother smiled, before she and the rest vanished from my sight.   
  
pI woke up, feeling something wet slide down my cheeks. My tears. Drying my eyes, I resolved to work harder now. Time was running short. It was now 6:00 a.m. I had exactly an hour to prepare before I headed to the newly-constructed Heroes' Memorial to deliver my speech.  
  
p~*~*~  
  
pAs I watched the crowd gather closer to listen to me, I felt a prickling sensation between my shoulder blades and I shuddered momentarily.   
  
pUne nodded encouragingly for me to continue, but as I opened my mouth I heard a loud report. A millisecond later, I felt a bullet tear through my chest. The pain was but for a second, and then I felt my body slowly go numb.   
  
pI was vaguely aware that my legs had given out under me and I heard much screaming from the civilians. The sounds became fainter and my vision started to blur. I knew I was dying, but I didn't notice the tears falling from my eyes and mixing with my blood that had darkened my blouse and pooled on the floor.   
  
pThere was total chaos around me. I heard Duo shout, Hilde was crying. The others were in a panic. I could hear other voices in my head and I wondered if I was dreaming. Strangely enough, it wasn't so painful anymore. There was a dull throb, but all I felt was that I was slowly floating into darkness.   
  
pSuddenly, I recalled that haunting dream. It had proven prophetic and I knew, from the predicted chain of events swirling in my head that my death would give way to a new revolution. I prayed that the opposite would happen. I didn't want anymore bloodshed. The wars in the past were enough.  
  
pI heard my father and mother calling me from the end of a black tunnel. Such sweet voices they had. i'They're calling me home…they want me home…my mother…my father…'/i I wasn't aware that I had spoken aloud because I heard someone reply and I felt that person hug me closer, giving me warmth.  
  
p"NO! You can't leave! Not now!"   
  
pI heard a new voice, a man's voice, I knew. It was nearer to me than the others. I felt a broad chest, muscular beneath the soft fabric of his shirt. And from the voice I knew it was none other than Heero.   
  
pI struggled to open my eyes, as I felt something wet splash on my cheek. There was pain again, but it was the pain in my heart that I felt.   
  
pbHeero was crying./b   
  
p"Must you…cry…Heero?" I asked, bringing up a bloodied hand in an attempt to wipe away the hurt in his arctic eyes.   
  
pI had to struggle to say each word. It was getting harder and harder for me to breathe. But I couldn't leave him like this. He took my hand, gripping it painfully, almost crushing it. From that gesture, I knew he was trying to keep me with him.   
  
p"Hush…don't say anything…don't you dare say anything…" he whispered brokenly, the tears flowing freely from his eyes. He gathered my limp form closer, kissing my forehead and then my hair. I felt his heart beat wildly, almost threatening to explode.   
  
pI had never seen Heero to be this emotional, but I finally realized how much he cared for me in actuality. That made me smile. I heard my mother and father call me again and I knew my time was coming to an end.   
  
p"Heero…look…at me…onegai…"  
  
p"Relena, please don't go…you can't. I won't let you," he said with conviction, his eyes burning into mine with a new emotion.  
  
p"Ah, yes…but my father…he is…calling me…I want to go…home now…please, Heero. Getting…harder to…breathe…" I looked into his eyes, forcing my lips to smile. I knew I would no longer be in his arms, but this one moment would be enough to last for eternity.  
  
pHe clung to me harder still, shaking his head. "You're not going anywhere…you can't. Not ever knowing how I feel…"  
  
p"Heero…you…stubborn lunkhead…" I chuckled slightly, wincing as pain lanced through my entire system. "I already knew…the moment you…told me you…were fighting for me…Somehow…"  
  
p"Lena?"  
  
p"Somehow…you cared for me…even in that…fleeting moment…" I stilled for a few seconds, trying to hold out for him. This time, I knew I was bound to fail. I would be dead in a few moments and I hadn't even said goodbye. And yet, I knew he would understand.   
  
pi'Just tell him, Lena…He loves you more than words could ever say how.'/i My father's voice rang through my head and I grinned inwardly. He always knew what counted the most in life.  
  
p"I…I love you…so much…Heero Yuy…Goodbye, beloved."  
  
pi'Thank you…Now, I know it is me you love…'/i With that last thought, I closed my heavy lids, the last of my strength fading away with my dreams of the future.  
  
p*****  
  
pHeero's eyes widened as he felt Relena's hand slip from his grasp. It was all horrifyingly real, and everything seemed to go by in slow motion. He shook her by the shoulders roughly, trying to keep her with him. He felt for a pulse. There was none. And then the anguish poured out of him like a dam overflowing.  
  
pHe broke down and cried. This time, the pain was too great for him to bear. And it wrenched at his heart like an iron fist, closing it in a vise.   
  
pb"RELENA~! DON'T DO THIS TO ME!"/b  
  
pRiver after river poured out of his blue eyes, pain etched on his face. He would never forgive himself. It was all a mistake. She wasn't supposed to die.   
  
pHis tears splashed on her now porcelain cheeks, the rosy tinge completely faded from her. Her once red lips were now a pale frost and the warmth that had once been hers, replaced with the coldness of death. b"SHE WASN'T SUPPOSED TO DIE!"/b he screamed, clutching the frail body against his.   
  
pHer blood wet his shirt, staining it, mercilessly taunting him that he had failed in his mission to protect her. "Dammit…Relena! Please don't die! Don't die…don't…" Heero's mouth repeated the phrase like a mantra, urging her to live. When she did not open her eyes, Duo put a hand on his shoulder.   
  
p"Heero, stop…It's over…There's nothing you or any of us can do…I'm sorry. Relena's dead."  
  
piRelena's dead. Relena's dead. Dead. DEAD./i The phrase was thoroughly ingrained in his thoughts forever and it would haunt him for the rest of his remaining years. He, the man deemed as the Perfect Soldier, had failed his most important mission.   
  
pHeero choked back a sob and looked down at the dead angel in his arms. Even in death she looked ethereal, and a slight smile was on her frosted lips. "Relena…my fallen angel…"  
  
p"Relena died knowing she hadn't failed. She lived her life the way she wanted it to be, for herself and for others, regardless of the dangers that lay ahead," Zechs stated, the pain in his voice evident to all of them.   
  
pNoin embraced her husband, not bothering to control her emotions the way she used to do in the war. Even the stoic Wufei had tears in his eyes as he returned Sally's embrace. It took all of Heero's strength to stand up on his shaky knees and clutch Relena's body in his arms. How he had wanted to turn back time and take that bullet for her. He berated himself again and again, wishing he would die right now, so he could be with her.  
  
pThe scene of her shooting came back in a blinding flash and then after grief, came rage. White-hot fury and a look of pure hatred emerged, and a fire burned in his eyes, unquenched by the renewed tears he would not shed. He would find that bastard and tear his limbs apart slowly, torturing him for taking away what had given his life meaning.   
  
pi'I swear, I shall avenge you, Relena. Then I shall sink my feet into Hell, in exchange for that taste of Heaven when we danced.'/i   
  
p*****  
  
pHeero stood in the rain, not bothering to tighten his jacket around him to ward off the cold. He had a new mission: bAVENGE RELENA'S DEATH BY FINDING HER ASSASSIN./b As soon as he would find him, he would torture him witless and kill him slowly. He refused to attend her wake and her funeral, the sight of her in the arms of Death too unbearable. i'After I find the asshole who did this to you, beloved...wait for me. I shall join you in our death-dance.'/i  
  
pHe found him after three hours of searching. Heero hid behind the battered door of the man's hideout, listening to him cackle about the success of his mission. "Ha! I finally proved to all that she's a power-hungry bitch!" Heero felt his gut tighten, and his vision darkened with absolute hatred. He stepped out of the shadows and aimed at the man just as he whirled around.  
  
p"What the-?! Who the fuck are you!? How did you get in?!"  
  
pHeero tightened his hold of the gun, his eyes turning an angry silver. "Your questions are irrelevant. My mission is to finish you off and bring your head to my superior." A shot rang out and Heero stood over the fallen man's body. Without saying another word, he decapitated the man's head and stuffed it in a bag. He headed to the Rose Graves where she was buried and as he walked, the bag containing the head dripped of blood, leaving a trail behind.  
  
pAs he stood over her grave, the newly-turned earth smelling damp, his gaze softened. "I've come back, beloved...and I have completed my last mission for you." Heero took out the bloodied head from the bag and held it up to the sky, a gruesome trophy to behold. Suddenly, the sky turned metal grey and all was silent. The Japanese pilot hurriedly stuffed in the head and tossed it into a garbage bin.   
  
pHeero wiped away the last of his tears and smiled. i'I wanted to find forever in you, but I was denied that chance. Death shall not have the power to separate us now.'/i  
  
pWith that, he drew out a knife and plunged it into his abdomen. The sun flashed behind his eyes and in an instant, he fell to the earth. And when he fell, he made no sound, his death as silent as a whisper. And somewhere beyond the horizon, two figures watched - one a young girl with tears in her aquamarine eyes and the other of a man with long, pale-gold hair - as the Perfect Soldier breathed his last. Relena turned her eyes skyward, beseeching. "Please...spare him...he deserves love."  
  
pHer father turned to her and smiled. "I heard Him, Relena...From this day on, you will be together. Heero has proved that even Death has no power over everlasting love."  
  
p"Yes, father...that is why Heero is the Perfect Soldier. And that is why I love him."  
  
p"So you did love me, did you?"  
  
pRelena whirled around. "Heero?"   
  
pThe young man smiled a genuine smile for the first time and held his arms open. "You knew that I loved you all along. Ever since I held you in my arms when we danced." Relena let out a cry of joy and flew into his arms, closing the distance between them, while her fathers - both biological and foster father - and her mother watched them, happy that bthere was no death of a dream, only the birth of forever./b  
  
p~*~*Fin*~*~  
  
pYou like? Or not? Flames and death threats are welcome, but please, DON'T GET CARRIED AWAY! I like receiving comments from everyone because it always helps me get inspiration. Do you know how many ideas are contributed to me everyday, even just through ordinary emails? Honestly, I could get used to this. It's crazy, but hey, I live for craziness! 


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